Codys gift.....

Ive been asked many times to share with you about my son Cody..all though I have way to much to put into one blog I will continue this if its of intrest to you. ;)
Most know that at a very young age Cody has had the ability to see and talk to the after life..for me it was never a question of believing him..instead I read everything I could get my hands and I encouraged him..
Sometimes he would be afraid,but more times than not he felt very at ease with what was happening to him...
I can remember at the age of 3 him describing to me what he could see...sometimes it was full figure with distinct features..and other times he would describe it as a bright light or floating ball..(which we later would explain to him is called an orb)..
There was a short time after my grand father passed away that Cody 'lost' this 'gift'.
We didnt realize at the time how much this upset him or why it was happening... when my grandmother passed 3 months later...he finally spoke up and asked why Grandpa didnt come to visit?
I did a little bit more research and one of the reasons that could have been..was that Cody was to close to his gramps...everything I read said that (just as cody)although he may want these visits..he wasnt ready..and because of that..Gramps knew...
This went on for a few years...when my dad passed away very suddenly Codys gift came into play once again...being a little older he was scared but embranced it...for him its second nature..
There are so many stories I could share with you,but I think the one that sticks out the most is when my Grandpa was still alive ..so I will start with that one :D
In advance let me say that I knew nothing of what Im about to share with u..it wasnt until AFTER the fact that I knew any of what had taken place.
Cody went back to my dads for a weekend..my dad lived in a loft on my grandpas property..
Cody and grandpa went to the bush to leave feed for the deer..off the property is a hunting camp where the hunters all stay during deer season,it was there that he saw a man wearing hunting gear holding a hand gun..(he later desribed him to a T ...)
When Cody came home he told me about me this..I asked him if he said anything to grandpa and he said no,so I asked if I could call gramps and tell him.
During the conversation gramps says to me "give me a minute I will be back' I have no clue why he has to put the phone down lol..he comes back on the line and says to me..
Janet you know I believe in Codys gift..you know I have always told you to encourage him and that I would do the same...I have to tell you..before he came back I laid in bed the nite before and I spoke to (we'll call him john)and I told him that he needed to give me a sign..he needed to show me that what everyone said wasnt true (at the time no clue what he was talkin bout)he said..cody gave me the sign I needed I could feel it in my gutt all along that 'john' didnt just walk away from his wife and kids..he went to the bush and took his life...he then goes on to tell me a year prior one of the hunters went missing...he went back to the cabin 'just for the nite..to get away' no one thought any thing of it the next morning when he wasnt around when gramps went to feed the deer...it wasnt until later in the day when his wife called back to my grandparents that red flags went up...
There was no explaination as to his where abouts..there were no clues..nothing...when the police got involved they too were under the impression that 'john' was considered a missing person...my grandfather on the other hand,as I said earlier,always felt in his gutt that he had taken his life...
Later there was a search done at 'johns' home and it was found that the only items missing were his hunting gear and his hand gun ,a 45 ...
His body has never been found.
Cody's 'visit' was enough comformation for my grandpa...everything that he had learned through the course of the year was proof enough when conbined with what the police found and cody 'saw'
This is just one of the many experiences Cody has had...I could go on and on...lol
Kinda sends shivers down your spine doesnt it ??
:D

one of the many reasons why.

Most that look at my little girl..see a beautiful redhead with big blue eyes.
I am very partial in thinking that your observation would be correct.
She is always told she looks like me...go figure?
Many times as her parents we have been told that we should have her be a model...maybe so and I know she would love the idea...however, I dont want her swallowed into a life from a vast photo collection that reassures her about her self image.
I would rather my little girl do as she does now...look into a mirror and tell herself that she is pretty.yes people she does do this.
O trust me she knows that those words she says are true..I joke that she is vain...and when asked what that meant I told her simply that she doesnt need anyone to tell her how she looks because she knows it herself.
I dont remember at her age having such self confidence...in all truth my appearance has always been an issue for me.
When I look at her I wish in the days of my youth that I could have been a little bit more like her..that being said..it hasnt always been an easy road with B.
At the age of 6 she was told by a family member for the first time..that she was fat...I cant even begin to tell you what that did to her.
For months afterwards I had to listen to her put herself down..she hated her hair..she hated her freckles...she was fat..she was ugly.
If I had known that the words spoken to her would destroy her confidence the way it did..my threat of bitch smacking the next person that said it to her wouldnt have been empty.
Finally after months B had built her confidence up enough that she once again liked who she was.
But yet again would be told by this same person repeatedly that she was fat and we would have to start all over from scratch each time.
It amazes me at how cruel an adult can be.
The more I think about the most recent events infuriates me beyond belief.
Unlike B I cant seem to bounce back this time and have really let this eat at me..thus the reason for todays blog.
I am woman that speaks her mind most times before I think...I am opinionated and have many times had to eat my own words because of it.
But when it comes to this person I find myself sometimes feeling intimated to do or say anything..that is how she is...
I am now faced with how my daughter feels about this person...saddly at her young age of 12 she wants nothing to do with her.
What do I say to that?
Can I say that I blame her?
How do I deal with this without my own personal feelings coming in?
How do I do my job as a mother 1. teaching her to forgive and ignore when I cant.
and .2 allowing her to make her own choice at such a young age as to how she feels?
This person has done this to herself...yet it all comes back to me..it will be my fault because of my attitude and how I feel ...
I know that those are things my children pick up on...I dont want to be the one to influence their choice of not wanting a relationship with this person yet I know part of it is because of me.
As a mother I want to do the right thing...I want to protect my babies from hurt that they dont need to experience...I want them to stand up for themselves but in a respectful manner..I want them to know that forgiveness is both a gift received and given..and that respect doesnt just come from a child to the adult but from the adult to the child
I am so wrapped up in my own anger towards this person that I really have no idea how to resolve this...
All I know for certain is that if I ever have to deal with this situation again in regards to my child being told she is fat...or any put down for that matter to any of my children...that I will put my foot down and show this person the door...I will gladly tell her..she is no longer welcomed in my home.
No one especially an adult is going to take my childs self worth and trample on it with mean vandictive words..
I really dont know how to end this..other than we wonder why we have so many young children that commit suicide..we wonder why we have kids that are on medication for depression...we wonder why we have cutters and kids with eatin disorders..kids that turn to drugs and alcohol...
This quite honestly is one of the many reasons why.